With more and more couples ring shopping together (which is now easier than ever to do with our new engagement ring shopping tool, The Knot Hint), it’s also becoming harder and harder to skirt the issue of knowing how much your partner is paying for your engagement ring. In the past, brides may have been completely in the dark about the price tag on their sparkler, but now, it’s really hard to not know, just because so many couples are living together before marriage.
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If you’re co-habitating and ready to get engaged, then there’s also a good chance that you split the cost of nearly everything in your household, have a decent idea of what’s in each other’s bank accounts and don’t make big purchases without each other’s input. If your engagement ring is going to be one of those big purchases—whether your partner is solely paying or you’re chipping in too, which is totally normal—then you should have an honest discussion about what seems reasonable and affordable for you at this point in your life. After all, an engagement ring is a major purchase and you may not want the price to be a secret.
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And if you get your ring appraised as part of your ring insurance—which you should 100 percent get—you may want to know how much it is, in the case of loss or theft. We say knowledge is power and being aware of the money spent on your ring shouldn’t be taboo—even if you find out on accident, like catching a glimpse of the receipt.
But if your partner is insistent on not wanting you to know, don’t push it—it may be a pride point, or he may not want you to envision a price tag instead of his love for you every time you look at your ring. And if you would rather not know, that’s completely normal too.
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If you’re torn on wanting to know the price or not, a fair compromise would be knowing the designer or the store where it came from so you can at least ballpark the cost. And if you’re ring shopping together in the first place and have an exact idea of what you want—down to the designer, cut and carat—there’s a good chance you can make an educated guess anyway.
